December 23, 2014

“Blessings of Christmas”

 

1)      Holiday greeting cards and letters so that “no old acquaintance should ever be forgot.”

2)     A white Christmas and the fun filled chance to make angels in the snow.

3)      Watching the awe and joy in my three year old grandson face, cuddling the newest grandsons and anticipating the arrival of one more in the April.  Their presence helps me to believe that the future is indeed bright.

4)     Sharing the magical holiday movies of my youth.  They make us believe miracles can still happen.

5)     Classic peppermint candy-canes moments; stirring them in hot chocolate, hanging them on the tree and finding a few broken ones to eat.

6)      Christmas fashions that never seem to go out of style: little girls in velvet dresses, tinsel headbands, Rudolph antlers, sweaters and more.

7)     Family to remember Christmas’s past with and build new holiday memories.

8)     Nativity sets, Christmas pageants and Christmas concerts:  They help remind us to keep Christ in Christmas.

9)     Special friends who add so much to our lives throughout the year. Even those that we have never met that we connect with daily on social media.

 

And finally, LOVE.  For without it, this world wouldn’t go around.

 

My wish for you this holiday season is that you will remember your own Christmas blessings.

 

Love

Lisa

December 16, 2014

In my living room sits one of my favorite chairs…..a rocker that belonged to my Mom.  This rocker has a long history to it. My Grandfather Syme bought it for my Grandmother Syme (my mom’s mom) when they were first married and it was one of the pieces of new furniture they bought in their short married life. You see my grandmother died at the tender age of 22 years old, leaving behind my mom, who was only 18 months old. My mother was raised by her mother’s parents and family and my grandfather remarried.  There is more to this story but I won’t go into it at the moment. 

 

This rocker  doesn’t really match my living room and it has been reupholstered a couple of times but it has good bones to it. I remember as a child growing up, laying this rocker on its side so it could be part of the blanket tents that my brothers and sister would build.  Just a couple of weeks ago I found a picture in a scrapbook that my Mom had given me, a few years before she died, that has my Grandmother Buchanan (my dad’s mother)  rocking me at 2 weeks old in this old rocker.  It started me thinking that this rocker was probably one that my grandmother used to rock my mom as a baby before she died and I know that my mom rocked me and my siblings in it and now I hold and rock my own grandchildren in it.  It has been around for a long time.  It is my favorite place to curl up and read a book.  It holds such great memories for me.

 

 

December 9, 2014

16 days to Christmas.  Are you all ready?  Are you one of those people who are all ready by Thanksgiving or are you one of those that procrastinate until the last minute?   I have been known to be one of those that procrastinate and save the shopping for Christmas Eve some years, risking the chance that the boys would not get what they asked for.  I would spend hours running from store to store looking for the gifts  and then I would spend all night after the boys went to bed that evening, wrapping gifts.  I would be stressed, grouchy and just wished for the day to come and go. I didn’t get to enjoy the holiday at all.  But it was my own fault.  I decided  a number of years ago that I was really going to work on simplifying Christmas for my family so that we could all enjoy it.  It wasn’t easy to change old habits but I kept working at it and it got easier every year.

 

We really needed  to be ready early this year since our son was expecting a new baby at the beginning of the month and we have a daughter in law graduating from BYU-Idaho on the 19^th and we will be taking an out of town trip just before Christmas so we needed  a game plan…. so I complied my lists and started early this year and guess what?....I am ready for Christmas!  Gifts are bought and wrapped, packages and cards are sent, and I have made one batch of frosted sugar cookies and will probably make one more batch before the big day.  If I am feeling really ambitious I may even try to make the fudge that my mother in law used to make.  Michael loves it but it is real fudge and I have not had much success with it.

 

It feels good to be done and this year there is a different feel in my house. I am not the grouchy, complaining, stressed out person that I usually am. It seems more peaceful and calm.  I have been able to enjoy the decorated tree, watch some of my favorite holiday movies, cuddle with my Hubby and snuggle with my new grandson.  It is nice to know that with 16 days left, even if I don’t get to the fudge, that we are ready for the holiday. For once in a very long time, I am looking forward to Christmas.

 

December 3, 2014

It was a pretty exciting day yesterday with the arrival of our second grandson, Sawyer.  I think my daughter in law said it best….I am smitten with him. He is the first of three grandchildren that we are going to be blessed with over the next few months. While we were all together for Thanksgiving last week my sons asked me what we were going to do next year with three more grandchildren running around and my reply was, “just love and spoil them, of course!”

 

I have decided that being a grandma is probably one of the best jobs in the whole world. It is all of the fun without some of the hassles.  I love being a mom but there is something special about being a grandma.  As a grandma you get to have a special relationship with your grandchildren.  As grandparents you get to “anti parent” as my children call it. When Mom and Dad say “No” there is a pretty good chance that grandma and grandpa are going to say “Yes” unless it is dangerous to you.

 

As I cuddled Sawyer in the hospital last night I was remembering my own mom and the relationship that she had with each one of her grandchildren.  She made each one of them feel special and took the time for them.  That is the type of grandma I want to be.  My oldest son remembers her teaching him to drive, because I couldn’t handle it.  LOL!!  My middle son remembers her taking him for 7-11 slurpees after his allergy shots that I couldn’t leave work to do and my youngest son remembers walking to her house after school for her homemade chocolate chip cookies.  Grandparents are great for filling in when parents can’t be there.

 

I will admit I got a little teary eyed as I held my newest grandson last night and I realized how much he brings to our family and how much we love him already.

November 25, 2014

I am a bit late posting my blog post this week but yesterday was the beginning of the holiday season for me at my job.  For the next six weeks I will be questioning my sanity, dealing with extreme grouchy people and trying to stay positive.  With holiday office parties going on, offices taking extra days off for the holidays and being short staffed in my office, this time of the year is always a challenge.

 

I work in healthcare, at a call center for over 1500 doctors.  We answer their calls after hours for emergencies. Now  bear in mind, I am not medical trained so if a caller tells me that they are having an emergency I am obligated to page the doctor on call. I am always amazed at what some people consider an emergency and I am equally amazed at how many times I have to argue with a doctor because he doesn’t feel like it is an emergency and doesn’t want to take the call. So I am just stuck in the middle between a grumpy caller and an equally grumpy doctor….and it is all my fault. LOL!!

 

But doctors that don’t want to take the calls  isn’t really the thing I want to talk about….it is the fact that I have found that this time of year people become extremely grumpy and downright mean sometimes.  Why is this?  I have been in this job for 16 years now and I think I get yelled and called names more during the holiday season than any other time of the year.  Isn’t the holiday season about brotherly love, peace on Earth and joy?  So why is it that some people feel like instead of the “happiest time of the year” it is the “grouchiest time of the year?” I think part of the reason is that we get so overburdened and stressed out with everything that we forget the true meaning of the holiday season.

 

For me, the true meaning of the season is FAMILY and FRIENDS. It isn’t about gifts, decorations or elaborate parties, it is about spending time with those you love and cherish. I made a decision a number of years ago that I wasn’t going to let another holiday season turn me into a “Grinch”.  I was going to simplify what I did during the holiday season and really focus on the little things….my Christmas village, putting up the tree, hot chocolate and watching the snow fall, watching “A Christmas Story” and National Lampoon’s “Christmas Vacation” with all the kids on Saturday, while we have Thanksgiving with them or  convincing the boys that I need help putting up the outside lights.  Michael and I have always made Christmas Eve a special night just for the two of us and we will continue with that tradition. I love seeing all the Christmas lights and I love visiting the cemetery where my mom is because one night  during the holiday season, the cemetery does a “Remembrance Night” with candles on all the headstones. It is all these things that really matter and help me to stay positive.

 

What little things do you focus on for the holiday season that help you to stay positive?

 

November 17, 2014

I have been wondering lately, why as women we are so hard and critical of yourselves?  Why are we always comparing ourselves to others and finding ourselves lacking in some area?  Why can’t we just love ourselves for who we are with all our flaws?  Why do we listen to the inner voice that tells us that we are not as skinny, as quick witted, as good of a housekeeper  or as smart as the next woman?  In our own ways, we have so much to give to each other, our families and our friends.

 

I think sometimes this concept of accepting ourselves comes with age.  I know that as a teenager and well into my 20’s and 30’s, I struggled with being able to accept myself for who I am. I was always trying to compete with someone…a friend, my sister, the neighbor, my sister in laws. I hated my curvy body and my DDD breasts.  I wanted to be that friend that didn’t have any breasts and was a size 5. As I started into my 40’s, things started to change for me. I started to realize that I was not doing myself any favors by being critical of myself.  I needed to start loving myself for who I was….flaws, DDD breasts and everything.  I needed to realize that I have qualities that make  me who I am and that I don’t need to be ashamed of those qualities. I don’t need to be as quick witted as my friend or garden as well as the neighbor   It wasn’t easy for me and I still struggle at times.  There are days that I compare myself to others and then I just need to give myself a quick kick in the seat of my pants and remind myself that I am okay.  There is a quote that I ran across a few years ago by Marjorie Pay Hinckley that has really helped me.

 

“We women have a lot to learn about simplifying our lives.  We have to decide what is important and then move along at a pace that is comfortable for us.  We have to develop the maturity to stop trying to prove something.  We have to learn to be content with what we are.”

November 10, 2014

A number of things have happened last week that helped to inspire this blog post this week. 

First of all, earlier in the week a friend of mine on Facebook, who I have never met, lost his wife of 15 years. It was very unexpected and I will admit that it affected me profoundly. 

A few days later my brother in law from Michigan sent us an email with a song from Kenny Chesney attached called, "Don't Blink."  Even if you do not listen to country music, this song has a great message. 

And lastly, I was cleaning house on Saturday when a thought came to my mind that I had read many years ago. I don't remember if it was a quote or a book but it talked about how we celebrate the "firsts" in our lives...our child's first step, our first real job, the first night we spend as a married couple in our new home but just as there are "firsts" in our lives, there are "lasts"....the last time our son or daughter sleeps in our home before they get married or the last time we hold the hand of our spouse or loved one. We shouldn't dwell on the "lasts" in our lives but use them to remind us that life is short. 

I believe that there are no coincidences in life and these reminders came at a time that I needed reminding about the importance of living in the here and now and not letting my anxiety cloud my judgment. Life is hectic and we are all busy but we are not promised a tomorrow and we should make the best of each day we are given. 

November 3, 2014

November is here and the holiday season is just around the corner.

I was saying to my Hubby last night that I really hate the fact that we go from Halloween to Christmas in just a couple of days, completely skipping Thanksgiving, that time of the year to stop and think of all the things we have and be thankful.

It is so easy for us to get caught up in the notion that we need more and if we have more, we will be happy. We feel like we have to keep up with the neighbors, coworkers or family members. How many of us have found ourselves saying...if I had more money, a bigger house or a better job then I could be happy? With this attitude we are setting yourselves up to be unhappy and we are not living our lives to the fullest. 

I will admit that I have found myself falling into this trap and I have decided that I am going to take the month of November to practice "An Attitude of Gratitude" on my Facebook timeline. Everyday I am going to post something that I am grateful for, no matter how small and I am challenging you all to do the same. 

October 27, 2014

My hubby and I have been on the receiving end of some judgmental people over the last few weeks.

My hubby is an appliance service technician with 30 years experience but when he has been in a few homes over the last few weeks to repair appliances and the customers are polled about their customer service experience it is not the level of experience they received from him for repairing their appliance that they comment on, but the fact that he smells like smoke.  Yes, my hubby is a smoker. Yes, he is trying very hard to quit. He doesn't smoke in their home or in his company van but he does smoke.

Because of some of the personal issues and trials that I have had over the last month it was brought to my attention that it might be because of my choice of reading material or my likes and comments on Facebook. 

Now this started me thinking....why are people like this? Hubby was told it was because we live in an area that is intolerant of his habit. Really?!  I was raised in this area and I was taught to be tolerant, kind, loving and accepting of others.  It was something that I taught my three children. It doesn't matter what someone believes or how they choose to live we need to be kind, tolerant and accepting. It doesn't mean we have to agree with them or like their choices. Not everyone has to believe in or live the way we do. What good comes to anyone when you are judgmental and unkind? 

I think this world would be a much better place if we could all be tolerant of people and just love and accept them for who they are. It is the differences in each other  that makes us special and adds color and variety to this world. How boring and bland it would be if we were all the same. 

October 20, 2014

It was 3 years ago today that I bought a book that literally changed my life. It was 2011 and I was still grieving the loss of my mom who passed away suddenly in February of 2010 and when I say suddenly, I mean suddenly. I had called her because she hadn't been feeling well that day but she said she was feeling better, that she loved me and would talk with me the next day, a hour later she was gone. She was my best friend and I was devastated.

It was my mom who taught me to love reading and books.  I remember many nights, when I was growing up sitting by her side while she read to me and my siblings. It was my mom who gave me my first Harlequinn romance to read in the 5th grade. I was hooked!

My children bought me a Nook for Mother's Day in 2011 because of my love for reading and I must confess at the time I thought it was a waste of money, boy was I wrong!!

I started looking for something different to read in October 2011, still romance, just different and I believe that it was divine intervention that I came across Heather Rainier's book "Divine Grace" and bought it, my first erotic romance. It was the theme of her book, "Seize the day and live your life with no regrets," that spoke volumes to my grieving heart and I realized then that life was too short and I was going to live my life so I didn't have any regrets. Heather's book was the catalyst for that life changing moment and a lot of the others that came over the next few years. 

So what book has influenced your life?

October 13, 2014

I posted this on my Facebook timeline the other day because it is something that I need to be reminded of on a daily basis. 

I will let you in on a little secret about me...I am a control freak! I am the oldest of five children and growing up I was the boss. When my parents left me to babysit at the age of 12, I was in charge, it was my way or the highway. You towed the line or else. When I said it was time to clean, you cleaned. My bedroom had to be neat and clean all the time and I just didn't abide with clutter, dirty laundry or dirty dishes left around. This caused many arguments between my sister and I since we shared a room and drove my mom crazy. I am sure my siblings were thrilled when I finally married and moved out. I am not proud of my controlling ways but it is who I am. 

Being married was an entirely new experience for me and I went into it thinking that I could control everything about it. It made for a rough start and it took me years to finally realize that I can't control everything and best of all, I don't need to. There are times that I just need to let go. There are days that I still struggle with letting go but I am working on it. I have realized that not having to be in control all the time makes me happier.  Yes, my house is still VERY organized but if the laundry doesn't get done or the dirty dishes are left in the dishwasher it is not the end of the world. I am just going to let it go and not stress about it. 

October 5, 2014

I was blessed with three wonderful sons, two of them live close to me and one lives out of state. All of them are married and their wives are expecting babies. I had the chance to have them all together this weekend. It was a great weekend but I found it entertaining that when they all get together it is like having teenagers all over again. Let me explain...they eat me out of house and home, they tease and roughhouse with each other, they gang up to tease and torment their dad and I, they are loud and obnoxious at times but what a joy it is to have them all together once in a while. Last night I was shaking my head at their antics and one of their wives said, "you raised them" and my reply was, " you all married them and there is no return policy on them." 

September 29, 2014

My middle son said to me last night that he always knew when it was fall because I started buying the candy corn. Those yellow, orange and white treats are some of my very favorite candies but it started me thinking about some of the other fall rituals I do. Fall is a time for me to start winding down. Summer is a busy time of year for us filled with boating, camping, yard work and many other activities but Fall signals a slower, more laid back season. I love watching the leaves change colors, I love drinking hot apple cider but I miss "real" apple cider from Michigan. I usually take one weekend and clean out and switch the closet and drawers from summer to winter. The house decorations change from pools, sunshine and boats to pumpkins and fall leaves. It is a time for chili and chicken noodle soup. I love cuddling up watching the football games and cheering for my favorite teams. Yep, Fall has arrived at my house. What are some of your fall rituals?

September 28, 2014

It seems like only yesterday that I was a young mother, raising 3 boys and worrying about them.  I worried about them taking their first steps, what they ate, who they played with, were they getting enough sleep,  whether or not they did their homework, I worried if they were doing their chores, if they attended school and I worried if they were going to graduate. I worried the first, second and third times and all other times when they took my car for a job or a date or an errand that had to be run.  I worried that they were going to get their hearts broken over their "first" love and worried that I would not be there to pick up the pieces.  I worried about them the first time they all left home whether it was for a mission or just their own apartment.  I looked forward to the day that they were grown up and I could stop worrying about them....fast forward a few years.....

Boy, was I wrong.  Not only do I have three grown sons to worry about but three daughter in laws and soon 4 grandchildren and lots of new worries....are they happy? Am I giving them enough space?  Am I respecting their decisions as adults? I am learning that worrying doesn't stop when our children grow up, it just multiplies.